[IELTS] WRITING_task 2_internet as their main educational resource

Q. Many people use the Internet as their main educational resource. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this practice?

Brainstorming

Intro

 

Body1

장점 : 찾고 싶은 정보의 영상이나 사진을 얻어 이해하기 쉬움. 정보를 얻을 수 있는 방법 중에 가장 빠르고 쉽게 정보를 얻을 수 있음 (책은 한 권을 다 읽거나 시리즈를 다 읽어야 얻을 수 있는 정보 , 인터넷은 요약되어 있는 정보를 빠르게 얻을 수 있음) - 얻고싶은 정보의 키워드만 입력하면 키워드와 관련된 많은 양의 정보를 얻을 수 있음. 

Body2

단점 : 너무 방대한 양, 출처를 알 수 없는 정보들 - 정보의 참거짓을 따질 수 없음. 교육적인 목적으로 활용하지만, 교육에 방해될 요소를 많이 가지고 있어 교육에 방해될 수 있음. 

Conclusion

인터넷은 교육적 목적으로 활용하기에 좋은 요소이지만, 조심해서 사용해야할 필요가 있음 

 

word count : 266 words

Answer

Intro 

These days, the internet is used as the major educational media worldwide. This essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of this phenomenon. 

 

These days, the internet is used as the major educational media worldwide. In modern society, the internet plays an important role in educational media worldwide. This essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of this phenomenon/ development/ breakthrough. 

 

Body1

On the one hand, there are several reasons which people use the Internet for searching educational information. Firstly, we can find some videos and pictures related to the information what I want to search. These resources are helpful to understand and remember the information. In addition, searching the Internet is the fastest way to get information. For instance, when we use books for obtaining information, we should read a whole book or all series of books and summarize the content. However, when using the Internet, we just enter the keyword what we want to know. Then, we can acquire the summarized data easily and more extra information.

 

On the one hand, the upper hand of the Internet when searching for educational information should not be overlooked. there are several reasons which people use the Internet for searching educational information. Firstly,

we can find some videos and pictures related to the information what I we want to search. Videos and pictures related to the information that we want to search can be easily found online. These resources are helpful to understand and remember the information. These resources are beneficial to decipher and retain the information. In addition, searching the Internet is the fastest way to get information. For instance, when we use books for obtaining information, we should read a whole book or all series of books and summarize the content. However, when using the Internet, we just enter the keyword what we want to know. Then, we can acquire the summarized data easily and more extra information.

 

- 단순한 문장구조의 반복, there are... we are... 

-> 복잡한 문장으로 바꿔보자구

we can find some videos and pictures related to the information what I we want to search.

-> Videos and pictures related to the information that we want to search can be easily found online. 

 

These resources are helpful to understand and remember the information.

-> These resources are beneficial to decipher and retain the information.

 

Body2

On the other hand, the Internet has several disadvantages. the Internet provides huge quantities of information. That means we don't figure out the data is right or wrong. we have to investigate the data thoroughly and it is a time-consuming task. Moreover, although we use the Internet as the educational resource, it has too much entertainment factors such as games, news and video materials. When people see some entertainment resources in which they are interested, most people can be easily misled by these factors because they want to do some fun things, not educational ones

 

On the other hand, In spite of the above mentioned views, the Internet has several disadvantages.  the drawbacks brought about by the internet should not be overlooked. the Internet provides huge quantities of information. That means we don't figure out the data is right or wrong.  We are able to obtain a huge array of information which is too much to figure out if the data is right or wrong. we have to investigate the data thoroughly and it is a time-consuming task. Thus, that forces us to look into the information thoroughly which is a time-consuming activity. Moreover, although we use the Internet as the educational resource, it has too much entertainment factors such as games, news and video materials. plenty of entertainment factors such as games, news and video materials exist on the internet. That means although people surf the internet to search for educational knowledge and facts, these fascinating factors can mislead them to click on it and waste their time, failing to use it for educational purposes. When people see some entertainment resources in which they are interested, most people can be easily misled by these factors because they want to do some fun things, not educational ones.

 

- on the other hand - 너무 뻔함 --> in spite of the above mentioned views;

 

 

 

Conclusion

To sum up, using the Internet is considered as the best educational mean and popular among the people these days. It can be positive method as well as negative one. Due to that, we should use the Internet properly.

 

To sum up, although the internet is considered as the best educational means, it cuts both ways. Due to that, we should use the inernet properly. 

 

Q. Many people use the Internet as their main educational resource. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this practice?

 In modern society, the internet plays an important role in educational media worldwide. This essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of this phenomenon/ development/ breakthrough.
 
On the one hand, the upper hand of the Internet when searching for educational information should not be overlooked. there are several reasons which people use the Internet for searching educational information. Firstly, Videos and pictures related to the information that we want to search can be easily found online. These resources are beneficial to decipher and retain the information. In addition, searching the Internet is the fastest way to get information. For instance, when we use books for obtaining information, we should read a whole book or all series of books and summarize the content. However, when using the Internet, we just enter the keyword what we want to know. Then, we can acquire the summarized data easily and more extra information.

 In spite of the above mentioned views, the drawbacks brought about by the internet should not be overlooked. We are able to obtain a huge array of information which is too much to figure out if the data is right or wrong. Thus, that forces us to look into the information thoroughly which is a time-consuming activity. Moreover, plenty of entertainment factors such as games, news and video materials exist on the internet. That means although people surf the internet to search for educational knowledge and facts, these fascinating factors can mislead them to click on it and waste their time, failing to use it for educational purposes.
 
To sum up, although the internet is considered as the best educational means, it cuts both ways. Due to that, we should use the inernet properly.